As if to make a mockery of my last post (I know, its been a long time), my son has launched a new Anti-Bedtime Campaign.

I want to spend time with my kids as they snuggle down, yes.  I want to make sure their routine is consistent and yadda yadda.  What I DONT want is what is currently happening.  The boy has decided that lying is the best way out of the situation.  In the past week, here are his excuses for getting out of bed (not uncommon, I know...except when he gets creative- then I worry a little).

"I have to go potty."

"Sissy needs me."

"I have to get my gun."

"My leg is broken."

"I was thinking about that noise and the fish was green."

"My foot is broken. Sissy stomped it with her car."

"There's a dinosaur in the washing machine."

"My bed is wet." (an all-time favorite because Mommy is a sucker and checks every time)

"My pee-pee is broken."

"I have a problem." (no, mommy does. His name starts with W)

"I need a popsicle."

"The girl at the library told me the tree was hers."

"I have to poop." (never true)

"My elbow is broken."

"I have itches."

"Sissy told me to get my gun." (sissy is fast asleep by now)

"I need to nurse."

"My toe is broken."

"I need to hug Daddy."

"I am going to drive Daddy's car out of here."

Admittedly, this is totally our fault. He's never liked sleep, always fought it, and especially hates being alone for it.  So over the past two and a half years, we've let him sleep in our bed, in his sister's bed, the couch....hey, he's sleeping.

And for those of you out there that possess the magic potion (or discipline...whatever), to make your kids respect bedtime and stay asleep in their own beds, don't judge. There's probably another area of parenting that you're completely sucky at, so let's just call it even.  I am NOT good at bedtime.

I put up with about five to ten or thirty excuses from him and have tried everything short of the "take them for a drive" thing to get him to fall asleep.  But in the end, he always wins.  Even if I do get him to sleep in his own bed, he only stays there until he rolls over at 3am to find me missing.  Then he runs into my bedroom and crawls in our bed, pushes and kicks until I finally give up my pillow, slide out of bed, and go to his room to sleep. 

That bed is really uncomfortable.




© 2013 Sarah Fisher